The Life Of A Kabbalist

Question: How does a Kabbalist of your level deceive his own egoism?

Answer: I don’t need to deceive it. I simply act to attract the upper Light and try day and night in all circumstances to arrange contact with the Creator, convincing myself that “There is none else besides Him” and that all this is only goodness.

And I am presented with such terrible and incomprehensible states in which I must confirm all this. In addition, a Kabbalist has a multitude of various calculations when he enters the state of Aba ve Ima, YESHSUT, and so on. Working in three lines, he begins to orient and live in this system.

Question: Does a Kabbalist convince himself? I thought that “There is none else besides Him” is as natural a feeling for you as the ability to see for the sighted.

Answer: No, it isn’t so. If you reach the very last degree and reveal on the last egoistic level that there is none else besides Him, only then do you really feel that in all manifestation of our animal and spiritual egoism there is no one but the Creator because you revealed Him in your heaviest desires.

The fact is that there are some events behind which a Kabbalist sees this single force, and there are other events behind which he still doesn’t see it, but tomorrow he’ll try to see it and he will see.

Question: Should a Kabbalist see this single force behind the external events of our world?

Answer: Of course, he should see it behind all the events of our world and the spiritual world. Practically, there is no division into two worlds. We just perceive it this way relative to ourselves.
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From the Kabbalah Lesson in Russian 1/29/17