A Prayer Just For Oneself Harms

Baal HaSulam, “A Sage’s Fruit”: During a common prayer a person is prohibited to separate from the others and to ask for himself, even if he wants to bring pleasure to the Creator, but he is going to do it himself, and not with the others. After all, he who disconnects from society and asks for his own individual soul does not build it, but on the contrary, he damages his soul, by becoming the “proud man, with whom the Creator cannot be together.”

It’s not easy to overcome this difficult psychological problem. Our ego does not allow us to understand, to remember, to learn, and to adopt the rule that only by coming out of the boundaries of our body will we find the vessel of our soul. And everything that I psychologically see now as my “I” exists only in my fantasy so that I must cancel this thinking, annul myself, and see myself outside of it.

To accept this fact, this worldview, and to live with it, we need the strong support of the environment and studies and hard work in mutual guarantee. Any action of correction starts from this because every time more egoism is added to us, we have to work with this additional load in order to decide that, in spite of it, our vessel is above it.

These messages: “That which is hateful to you, don’t do to others” and “Love thy neighbor as thyself” seem to us simple rules of courtesy, “cultural” behavior, moral homilies. But no, we talk about an internal orientation that must exist in a person if he wants to find his inner part, his soul, and begin to correct it.

That is why the one who prays for himself not only does not advance in spirituality, but also causes great harm to himself because by this he cuts himself off from the others, worsening the breaking. Although it’s clear that negative actions are also inevitable because a person needs to come to the realization of evil before he understands and feels that this is an incorrect attitude.

But we are about to complete this work, and that is why we must understand and constantly reinforce the general opinion that spiritual existence, advancement, and the result of work are only in “We,” not in “me,” but only between us. This where we need to draw all our forces, trying to accustom ourselves to this view and replace ourselves with “We” in order to live inside the soul.
[101778]
From the Preparation to the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 3/3/13