Strengthening The Nuclear Family

Question: Often a state is created in a family where one of the spouses, for example, the wife says: “I cannot stand my husband anymore, I am literally sick of him.” In a case like this, do we need to recommend the couple enter integral education, as this would be better than if they got divorced?

Answer: A stage of disappointment is a natural stage through which all of humanity passes. Therefore it is not necessary to pay attention to it. If we now direct the disappointed couple to a new goal, then they will quietly continue their existence with more correct and close cooperation.

They don’t need to separate at all. The moment one of the spouses sees in the other what he saw before that is beneficial, but spiritually beneficial, then certainly this union will be renewed with new intensity.

Question: How can we explain to people that they should not separate?

Answer: In general, I would not tell them that we insist upon the continued existence of their union at all; rather, I would suggest that they clarify once and for all if they are compatible with each other, whether it is worthwhile for them to divorce or do something else you can check so that both of them realize what is happening and will stop tormenting each other and that the decision is always in their hands. We only conduct aworkshop where all of this becomes clear.

That is, instead of their contending for many months, within an hour everything will become clear to them and after the workshop they will go out together in peace, already with completely different thoughts, with another intention; they will no longer intend to divorce.
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From Kab TV’s “Through Time” 9/21/13

Two Prayers: A Private Prayer And A Group Prayer

There are two types of prayer. The first prayer (MAN) is in order to be incorporated in the AHP of the upper, which is the group that is connected in one whole. GE of the lower are incorporated in the upper when I enter the group, as if in a womb, and it operates on me and provides me all the care that I need, making me feel that there is nothing that I lack.

There are systems that take care of me inside this womb. I don’t need to think about anything except for how to be absorbed inside this womb. The 3 days of conception are the main thing.

By my desire to be incorporated in the upper, I evoke it and force it to attain greatness. I turn to the whole group and thus understand that there is no way I can succeed by myself. So I evoke the group and call it: Let’s receive the Light, the force, the corrections from the Creator, that will be revealed in us. But He will be revealed in order to establish the connection between us and to develop this connection. It’s as if we operate our incubator, and I ask for it together with all the others.

The first MAN is my private prayer by which I am incorporated in the group. The secondMAN (prayer) is the general MAN, when we turn to the Creator as a group and the Creator already begins to reveal Himself. The response for the second MAN is immediate—MAD.
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From the 3^rd part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 10/13/13, Talmud Eser Sefirot

In A Stage Of Formation

Question: Very often people who come to the morning lesson, study very intensely, have a regular and normal family,  and believe they have no need to be involved with the integral method.

Answer: We are in a state of transition; all this is still being organized; it is in its infancy. In the meantime, a person is not ready to be involved simultaneously in his development, his family, and his work.

While he is locked into some kind of process, for example, in science, a person still cannot feel himself broad enough to be able to be involved with his family as well as the collective family, the whole of humanity.

The time will come when you need it. But if all of a person’s feelings and thoughts are centered first and foremost on the ordinary work necessary for existence, and then on the development of the integral method, he often will not have the energy or time to be involved with this in a family.
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From Kab TV’s “Through Time” 9/21/13

A Social Unit Which Focuses Everything

Question: What should the relationship be between the partners in an integral family?

Answer: Relationships in a family are determined by the goal we set in front of us. In the past when people were getting married their goal was a common household and physical love. Whereas, in the integral society they primarily will be looking for a similarity of properties between themselves: Do we really fit for uniting with each other in order to form the most successful unity—a family?

I am sure that people will be looking at one another based on these properties rather than physiological ones. Physical properties will certainly be taken into account as well because our world does not disappear. However, the basis for creating a family will become precisely an opportunity of the inner unity.

There will be a need for thinking about tests, problems, and the possibilities of researching each of the partners. This is very serious work because a family is the smallest and the most desired natural unit of society which focuses on everything: The connection of the material and spiritual worlds.
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From Kab TV’s “Through time,” 9/21/13

Checking The Purity Of Intentions

We have to enjoy the action of bestowal because the goal of creation from the side of the Creator is to delight the created beings. And the created beings are designed to delight the Creator as the grateful guest of the host. That is why we constantly have to target pleasure, discovering how to be able to bring joy to the Creator by accepting all the treats from Him. The main thing is that this all is for His delight.

Only this should be the goal of all our actions included in the original thought. On this basis, I have to seek how I can bring the Creator pleasure. What specific tools do I have for this, not just my imagination? What can I do for Him in my state today, now? In what form and through whom: inanimate nature, plants, animals, people, and myself? How do I need to organize myself for this internally, in my thoughts and desires?

Thus I start focusing the reality that I perceive in a single beam, in one direction, trying to orient it to the service of the Creator. These thoughts are called the intention, the purity of which I have to check. What if I am deceiving myself?

I have to pass the scrutiny of all my thoughts and the intentions correctly through the group. Then, I will not be able to lie to myself and will see my true attitude to the friends, how much I avoid them or agree to unite with them. Am I ready to unite with their hearts and be concerned about the others more than about myself? Do I consider our unity as an opportunity to delight the Creator by letting Him be revealed in our points in the heart?

Thus, gradually, the whole reality is focused in the center of the group and there is nothing else to be concerned about but to bring the Creator joy through our unity. And to the extent to which we want to delight Him, we reveal the Creator in the center of our unity.
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From the Preparation to the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 10/18/13

Overcoming The Last Resistance Of The Corporeal Ego

If a person is kept apart from others, different fears, worries, anxieties, disappointments, and doubts immediately overcome him. He feels lost and doesn’t know what to do. It is all meant to teach him that he must work above reason, above his mind, and to immediately incorporate in the center of the group among the friends and accept their opinion. This is the only way he can be saved.

No one can face these obstacles bravely by himself, no man or woman. So, if you have any doubts, fears, or worries about the path we follow and the work and you feel an urge to escape, it is an indication of your weak connection to the group. You never will be able to overcome these fears by yourself, but only by hiding in the group and accepting the opinion of the friends, like a small child hiding behind his mother’s skirt. This is the only way one can be saved and awarded with the right to be signed in the book of life.

Everyone will still experience many doubts, fears, thoughts for and against, and shame. In that case, we simply need to incorporate in the group and borrow the friends’ mind and senses by totally annulling oneself. Take everything that they have and this surely will lead you to the goal. Don’t count on what you have since you have nothing but your ego. Change it to the general opinion of the group and you will succeed.

You only can be saved in the center of the group, which is the place that a person enters with his eyes closed, accepting the opinion of others and lives that way. There is no other way. All the resistance of our ego, the problems and the doubts, are meant to force us to be incorporated in the center of the group. So, let’s not forget this and support one another. The main thing is to let everyone know about our connection and unity. Thus, we will acquire a general common mind and will attain mutual guarantee.

When I hear about the resistance that we encounter, I am glad! Let the resistance be even stronger and crueler. Let the critics attack us like a pack of dogs that have grabbed our clothes with their teeth, but who cannot bite our flesh. This shows how strong and powerful we are, and the need for this strong resistance will be the last push that will help us make the last efforts to attain the unity we need in order to exit the slavery in Egypt.

Thanks to it, we can leap above the level on which our ego and all the critics operate. They will not be able to hold onto our yearning for bestowal since they don’t see or feel it. They only notice our ego, trying to bite it where it remains, but, if we rise above it to bestowal, all the dogs will disappear, and there will be no resistance left.

It is like a missile that is launched while making a terrible noise, explosions, a pillar of fire, and great efforts to leave the Earth’s atmosphere. Suddenly, the missile transcends the earth’s gravitational force and everything quiets down. The resistance ends and we find ourselves flying freely in space.
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From the Talk during the Meal 10/18/13

A Guarantee Of Equals

Question: After the morning lesson we begin a new day. How is it possible to use this day most effiectively? How is it possible to advance without delay and procrastination?

Answer: We need to think about the guarantee, about the conditions for the guarantee, so that this concept will be as close as possible to us.

In the one collective soul, each one is included in all. The mutual inclusion doesn’t indicate control, but rather equality. And the equality is in this, that each one nullifies himself in regard to the others. Only then are we equal.

Pay attention only to this and focus on this. With this we will win, not in any other form. All other victories will turn into a loss.
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From the 3^rd part of the Daily Kabbalah Lesson 10/10/13, Writings of Baal HaSulam

If There Is No Goal, There Is No Joy In Life

Question: It is now absolutely clear to doctors that a human being is not only comprised of physiological systems of the body and mind, but also of the desire for a purpose. But we know that this is a person’s spiritual level. So he is compelled to build relationships between himself and the goal, his environment, and also to his body.

Recently, we are faced with the fact that people have been relating to their bodies negligently or even contemptuously, and consequently they are subject to disease. So how should one relate to the body?

Answer: As a result of thousands of years of development, a person has reached a state where he is not happy to be alive. Subconsciously we don’t want to live. Everything is in vain: the anguish, the suffering; life, what is it all? Do I need to feel that I am joyful, happy? But I don’t.

If I get some kind of satisfaction, it is attained through unjustified effort, and then it either passes very rapidly or at any moment it transforms into the opposite. So people truly don’t want to live. Therefore contempt for the body is only a small consequence of the current condition. A person secretly feels that he would be happier if he didn’t exist at all.

In the past there was nothing like this because we still had not evolved to this awareness. Today we have a conscious approach to life, the futility of our existence, the lack of fruitfulness, the degradation. We understand our nature, our nothingness. Nobody asked us if we wanted to be born, to be educated in this society, or in another society. We don’t understand what, where, or how.

There was a time when we had defined goals. We were still not that developed and so we went after whatever seemed permanent, building something, yearning for something. One yearned for capitalism, some for communism, and others yearned to explore space. We wanted to prove something, to struggle, and to attain some kind of self-affirmation. Today none of this exists; everything has simply disappeared and an “empty sink” remains where all the water has drained from. We no longer have anything to fulfill us.

Therefore we even look at our bodies with contempt. This explains the attraction to drugs, antidepressants, and suicide. Moreover, this is not only seen in developed countries, but everywhere, in Latin America, and even in Africa, in those places where people were sufficiently happy in the past despite their wretched existence. Today this no longer exists. There must be some kind of purpose for a person for one to engage in himself, his appearance, sports, etc.
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From Kab TV’s “Through Time” 10/20/13